down down down in the dumps.

21May08

It’s raining out.
My roommates are not in at the moment, I am home alone.
The big Man. U vs Chelsea game is tonight.
I have been eating nothing but cake for the whole entire day.
Last run was on Sunday.
Sunday! So close to exploding from all this pent up stress right now.
I. Really. Really. Should. Be. Studying.
Haven’t been able to sleep.
Partly because I can’t afford to.
But mostly because my entire bed is buried underneath a mountain of notes.
Only reason my laptop is even switched on is so that I can charge my iPod.
Finals start Friday.
That’s two days away.

And I am so very screwed.

Listening to Carolina Liar’s Beautiful World:

Cue the irony.


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5 Responses to “down down down in the dumps.”  

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  1. 1 munie on May 21, 2008 said:

    u’ll do just fine my dear. have faith! ;) jgn stress2 alright.. *BIG HUGS*

  2. 2 aira on May 22, 2008 said:

    maddie? yes its you! i found you on sab’s page. i didn’t know you know her. how you doing? hope all is well. all the best for the exams. :)

  3. 3 maddie on May 22, 2008 said:

    munie and aira i love you both.

    i really miss you guys. it’s crazy here right now, everything is a total mess and i am beyond trying to look for the proverbial silver lining crapnonsense, all that lyrical ‘this too shall pass yadda yadda’ whatnot.

    yesterday we heard news that a senior of ours killed himself. jumped off the 13th floor of his apartment after failing to die from slitting his wrists, i kid you not. how f-ed up does that sound to you? this place does bad things to the morale.

    not that i’m going anywhere close to offing myself that way, i think i’ve outgrown all the razors and suicidal tendencies, but sometimes a girl wants to believe there’s more to life than finding temporary happiness in a tub of chocolate ice cream. or tuning out the bad vibes dancing alone to the beats of a good album. or desperately hanging on to blind faith.

    i’m just caught in the middle of a really long bad day it seems, and considering the exams span an entire month i think i shall have turned into a wretched witch by the end of it. wrinkly and disgruntled and stuck with a permanent frown on her face blegh.

    thank you for the hugs munie. and for the hope, aira :) for caring enough to give a rats ass. i needed that.

    btw i don’t really know sab, that was just random blog hopping (was online again on the pretense of studying. well if you count wikipedia as a legit excuse for studying). blame tabbed browsing!

    in the meantime i shall follow your example and breathe. hard.

    loves -M

  4. 4 lubna on May 24, 2008 said:

    Ya Allah. My heartfelt condolences to your senior and his family.

    Dear Maddie, though this might come from a ’stranger’, I believe sending wishes and prayers shouldn’t be exclusive in any way. I’ll pray for your strength and patience, and hope you get what you hope for, insya Allah.

    You’ll make it through, keep your head up!

  5. 5 egdellog on June 5, 2008 said:

    i feel ya. at least you’re listening to some great music like Carolina Liar. Good luck with finals.

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